All Crikey!

Some of the best yearbook quotes you’ll ever bloody see

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We don’t know about the rest of the world, but here in Australia, the school year is coming to an end for our grade 12s. Those f**kers are about to be unleashed on society, and you’ve gotta imagine they’re pretty happ...

17-year-old sheila breaks Guinness Book of World Record for having longest legs

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If there’s one book that everyone in the world bloody loves, it’s the Guinness Book of World Records. Year in, year out, that thing gets tongues wagging, settles arguments, and creates a comprehensive list of the grea...

Footage captured shows 11 year old kid taking joyride in stolen school bus

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Look, for our American friends, we know it might feel like we’re punching down a bit lately and focusing on a fair bit of the s**t going on in your neck of the woods. We honestly don’t mean to. It’s just that—without ...

UFC Commentators label this spinning-heel-kick “the greatest KO ever”

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Whether you love or hate the UFC, there’s no way you can deny the prowess of the fighters involved. Whether they’re enduring a brutal arse-kicking or handing out some serious punishment, you’ve just gotta admit that t...

Unique camera angle shocks internet with how big bloody moose can get

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For all the big bloody animals we’ve covered in recent months, we have to admit that we haven’t really given Moose the credit they deserve. These f**kers are, quite simply, bloody massive. Here’s the thing, though, fo...

Some of the most satisfying objects to sooth your OCD

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If you’ve spent any time on YouTube – and we have to assume you have – you’re probably all over those videos that show you ‘perfect’ objects and processes. We’re not gonna lie. We reckon there’s a pretty f**ken solid ...

These cheeky parrots were relocated after swearing too bloody much

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F**ken parrots. If you’ve got much experience with talking ones, you probably know that they can be real troopers when it comes to swearing. Deadset, the avian b**tards are well-known for turning the air blue. That pr...

Adam Sandler’s Attenborough-like narration of Kevin James in fur suit is bloody gold

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We’ve said this on more than one occasion now, but while Adam Sandler isn’t everyone’s cup of tea, there’s a whole generation of people out there who grew up with his movies and comedy stylings as an almost permanent ...

Adult toy company claims new device gives men a female orgasm

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Look, we obviously decided against starting this piece with some sort of joke about the female "O", but the reality is that we just couldn’t make one happen. Still, we’re not saying that’s our fault, we’re just saying...

Man dives in to swim with harmless shark, then realises it is a Great White

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Some people in the world are made of different stuff. Deadset, these blokes see things that’d make most of us go ‘yeah, nah,’ and they try to get closer to it. Take the bloke in this video for instance. He sees a shar...

Aussie kid’s encounter with relentless swooping magpie is brutal

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We’ve spoken about this in detail here before on Ozzy Man Reviews, but magpies are f**ken c**ts. Deadset, tourists are scared of our dunny-spiders, snakes, scorpions, sharks, serial killers and saltwater crocodiles, b...

Footy player caught celebrating goal with a bloody trampoline-like jump

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It’s been said that, to the outsider, Aussie Rules can often look like a big bloody fight with a ball in the middle. While we don’t necessarily agree with the sentiment, we kind of get it. Still, there’s a f**k-tonne ...

Earth to get second moon in October, completely man-made

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One infallible rule of life is that the earth has one moon. Until now. Yeah, nah, apparently, the earth’s about to get a second moon. Some of the more mystically and mythically-minded among you might figure that can’t...

Jeopardy contestant answers Batman question with impression of super-villain

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F**ken Batman. Obviously, he’s one of the greatest superheroes to grace the pages of comic books, television screens and big-budget Christopher Nolan movies. We don’t think there’s any doubt about that, but considerin...

Joe Rogan’s new $14.4M Texas mansion is f**ken gorgeous

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The other day, we showed you lot some pictures of UFC supremo Dana White’s temporary digs on Fight Island. As you know, they were pretty f**ken swish. Today, we’re having a squiz at the property podcaster, UFC comment...

Professional Wrestler’s entrance to Madonna song is all time

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Love it or hate it, you can’t deny that professional wrestling is, at its best, a wildly entertaining proposition. Yeah, nah, we can get behind that train of thought. It’s obviously not real, and to be honest, claimin...

The most dangerous aspect of travel in 2020 might not be the novel Coronavirus

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There’s really not much in life that’s as gross as a used glove. Yeah, nah, the rubber Johnny might be a lifesaver, but there’s no denying that once it’s used, the only place for it is in the bin. Deadset, on their ow...

Dana White flexes his ballin’ hotel room on UFC’s Fight Island in Abu Dhabi

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Those of you who get a big f**ken hard-on for the UFC will know that the upcoming Fight Island events are a pretty bloody exciting proposition. Taking place over five weeks, five fights will take place on Fight Island...

Some of the cringiest notes from teachers you’re likely to see

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Sometimes you’ve gotta feel sorry for teachers. Deadset, those poor b**tards have to put up with some real s**t. But, on the other side of the coin, they must see some f**ken funny s**t as well. Anyway, as part of tha...

How Janet Jackson’s ‘wardrobe malfunction’ helped spawn creation of YouTube

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Janet Jackson and her nip-slip. If you’re of a certain vintage, you probably remember this being the biggest bloody news in the world. Yeah, nah, it didn’t matter that s**t was going down in the Middle East, what was ...