All Crikey!

Police are on the hunt for the Kiwi Butt-Plug Bandits

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We all know the media loves to come up with catchy names for people. If you’re an alleged criminal, that name might have something to do with your alleged crimes. With that in mind, we give you the Butt-Plug Bandits. ...

Bloke accidentally makes sheila think he is a serial killer, deletes her online account

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All right, ya big bloody legends, you know we love a bit of Reddit around here. The reason for that, as always, is that it’s a melting pot of people who aren’t afraid to tell you s**t you really don’t need to know. No...

Bloke charged with murder after throwing hot dog napkin in bin at hockey game

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We’ve got to be approaching the point where there’s just no getting away with murder. Technology might not have advanced to Minority Report levels, but f**k me sideways, it’s pretty s**t hot. You might have heard of a...

The terrifying moment a 5 metre Great White Shark lunges out of the water

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Let’s talk f**ken sharks for a moment. Everyone knows what they are and just how badly they can f**k you up, but despite our love of wildlife, we don’t talk enough about the b**tards on this website. Having said that,...

Ozzy Police release footage of UFO claiming “we are not alone”

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Righto, stop f**king about, don your tin-foil hats, cue the X-Files music and get ready to s**t your bloody pants. Extra-terrestrials are here. They’ve arrived. They’ve come to mutilate our f**ken cows, abduct our red...

The bloke who made the glitter-bomb has now helped clean undrinkable water

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G’day, ya glorious f**kknuckles. We’d like to start this one off by saying we hope you're keeping your fluids up and that we hope you’ve got the freshest cleanest water available to you. The reason we say that is simp...

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West’s house looks like something out of a bloody horror film

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Look, right off the bat, that’s a bloody big call. But, it’s pretty much accurate. And, just for clarity’s sake, we’re not talking about a spooky one like the house on Niebolt street in It. Yeah, nah, we’re talking ab...

Genius lottery winning bloke wears “Scream” mask to collect prize ceremony

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Winning the lotto is supposed to be a bloody good reason to celebrate. You’re supposed to collect your check then walk into the local tav and buy everyone a round of beers. Then you need to walk into work and tell the...

Bloke who thinks his “Johnson” keeps getting bigger gets embarrassing reality check by Doctor

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Fark, this is a tough one to get through without a bit of a shudder. Obviously, you’ve seen the headline and you get the general gist of it, but just to make it more clear, anyone who’s ever watched Red Dwarf is famil...

Teen jailed after buying PS4 for $10 by scanning it as “fruit” at self-checkout, twice

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Bloody hell, this story really highlights the fact that some blokes are just born with the ability to rort the system and come up with some sketchy-as-f**k methods to score themselves a bloody bargain. Deadset, have a...

This bloke had wet dreams over his cockroach girlfriend, and ate her when she died

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All right, let’s get the caveats out of the way this one, because it’s gonna escalate pretty f**ken quickly. We bloody love the Japanese and have tonnes of respect for their culture. We think they’re a bunch of mint b...

Elon Musk fires the Mars Starship Raptor engine for the first time

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Elon Musk has set tongues ablaze with some cheeky tweets that hopefully will pave way for human passage to Mars. That’s right mars. Elon and his mates at SpaceX lit a rocket on fire and the space geekery world literal...

Ozzy burger joint “Pablo’s Escoburgers” in strife for serving burger with a line of white powder

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These days, there seems to be a bit of a battle for the moral high ground taking place between those who want to deem everything offensive and those who want to go a little beyond the realms of good taste. With that i...

Teenager wakes to find over 16 million bucks in his bank account after bank made error

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Whether you’re a bloody hard worker whose okay with some fair dinkum hard yakka or not, you can’t deny that the ultimate dream is becoming rich while doing absolutely f**k-all to deserve it. You know, like the Kardash...

Meet the bloody legend who saved homeless people from the polar vortex

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By now, we’ve all heard of the polar vortex that’s been freezing the USA’s collective balls, butts and boobs off, but while we’ve been inundated with humorous videos of blokes burning themselves with hot water and blo...