Kangaroo Sends Cyclist To Destination F***ed!

What’s that, Mr Cyclist?  You want to ride in the middle of the road?  Well, how about a farken projectile kangaroo to the face, ya dickhead!

Bang!  This cyclist gets absolutely bloody walloped by this kangaroo!  One minute they’re riding quite happily in the middle of a long stretch of road out at Boonah, thinking about how they don’t give a shit about any traffic that’s gonna come their way, and the next they’re taking a snooze in the land of Destination F***ed!

Oblivious to the incoming marsupial, the cyclist has no idea how quickly their day is about to turn sour. Credit: Jukin Media

Now, I don’t know about you, but I can quite happily watch videos like this on repeat time and time again.  I’m not sure why, maybe I’m just a complete prick of a person, but nevertheless, that moment where you see them veer onto the left and you see the grey flash come in, that’s when you know sh**’s about to go down.

Right. In. The. Face! Credit: Jukin Media

Next thing, the kangaroo looks like it’s been launched like a midget at a dwarf-throwing contest and the cyclist just eats sh**.  They don’t have a clue what’s hit them.  They just…topple.  It’s a thing of beauty.

The ninjaroo begins its mickey flip. Credit: Jukin Media

Best of all, Mr projectile kangaroo does not care one iota.  He’s like, “Seeya dickheads.  I’m out of here,” and he happily hops off into the outback.  Have a go at it.  It’s a bloody ninja kangaroo.  It chucks a mickey flip, lands on its feet and f**ks right off without even checking on its victim.  That, my friends, is a hit and run.

The cyclist goes down! Credit: Jukin Media

Meanwhile, the cyclist looks like they are out cold.  They just lie there on the hot gravel, probably regretting their decision to wear all the lycra on the day they’re about to go viral on the internet…ah, who am I kidding?  Cyclists have no shame, we all know that.

The ninjaroo lands. The Romanian judge gives it a perfect 10! Credit: Jukin Media

All I can say is thankfully it wasn’t one of the big staunch reds the internet has gotten to know recently, because one of those would have juggernauted the sh** right out of cyclist and bike.

The roo is outta there! Credit: Jukin Media

Damn I love Australia!

H/T: The West.com.au.