Man dies after massive stack of porn magazines falls on him

Everyone who has ever owned pornography has asked themselves the question, ‘if I died, and someone found my stash…what the f**k would I do!?’. It truly is one of life’s tougher dilemmas. Unfortunately this Japanese bloke has dealt with a worst case scenario. Found dead in his apartment, buried under a stack of porn magazines. And by stack we mean 6 tons of nudey mags!

The poor guy was found months after passing away in his abode by his landlord. This to be honest is not a good way to go in general. But to add a bit of extra pain it just so happens that there is a theory that it was actually the stack of porn magazines falling that might have been the cause of his demise.

Credit: Asiawire

This cannot be proven, and an actual cause of death is unknown or at least kept from public. So lets just give the bloke a bit of respect and show a bit of decency. This is like getting kicked in the nuts but worse.

Credit: Asiawire

There are a few things that seem a bit out of place though.

Now 6 ton is a f**king lot. As an aussie we don’t deal in ton, so mother Google was consulted and turns out 6 ton equates to nearly 5500 kilograms! Now I’ve been worried about search history before but holy sh*t is that a lot of porn.

Man in Japan Found Dead, Buried Under 6-ton Pile of Porn Magazines https://t.co/PRH3usqsaJ pic.twitter.com/kNDnlqToJb

— BCNN1 (@bcnn1) March 4, 2017

Google also mentioned that an average magazine weighs 87 grams, and there is 1000 grams to a kg. Meaning with a bit of crude maths, he had amassed a whopping 60,500 porn magazines in his time. He also was in his 50s meaning that he had bought magazines at a volume of 3 per day since birth. They say everything in moderation, but this feels a little f**king excessive.

Credit: Playboy Magazine

The other weird question is why physical porn over online? VPN, incognito and clear the f**king f**k out of that shit mate. Wipe the slate clean, well as clean as it can be. But maybe he was a traditionalist and prefers the physical form? Like someone who prefers to read a book over kindle, I don’t get it, but whatever floats your boat.

Final Thought: If this is true I feel a bit bad for the bloke. Everyone has had a near escape or capture when it comes to porn and knows how bad it feels. But to end up in destination f**ked by 6 ton of porn is next level. And our collective porn loving hearts bleed for him.

H/T: Daily Mail