People have been figuring out how to have sex on the Tokyo Olympics’ anti-sex beds
If you’ve been around over the last few days, you probably saw that link we posted about the anti-sex beds the Tokyo Olympics is trying to fob off on the athletes over there. Of course, sex is the main reason for innovation on the planet, and it hasn’t taken long for people on the internet to start engineering ways around the anti-sex beds. Have a bloody look.
If you do remember this one, you probably remember that the beds are made of cardboard, and plenty of people reckon that as soon as any vigorous humping, any horizontal shuffling, or any sideways schlepping takes place on ‘em they’ll f**ken break.
Beds to be installed in Tokyo Olympic Village will be made of cardboard, this is aimed at avoiding intimacy among athletes
Beds will be able to withstand the weight of a single person to avoid situations beyond sports.
I see no problem for distance runners,even 4 of us can do😂 pic.twitter.com/J45wlxgtSo
— Paul Chelimo🇺🇸🥈🥉 (@Paulchelimo) July 17, 2021
Of course, when it comes to hide the sausage, people are always keen to figure out ways around any potential cock-blocking techniques. Also, for what it’s worth, we’re aware that not all sex includes a pork sword, a meat snorkel or a cream-cannon. People are also keen to figure out ways to problem solve techniques designed to stop mad scissor-action too!
happily, no humans have ever had sex on the floor so this is foolproof
— Dara Moskowitz Grumdahl (@DearDara) July 17, 2021
And that brings us to some of the ideas doing the rounds online. Clearly, some have pointed out that the beds can hold 200kg, and that means they can support a lot of long-distance runners, with some suggesting that orgies of up to four of those buggers should still be dandy.
Teamwork makes the dream work pic.twitter.com/qHJ2cNGbaC
— Mild Hepcat (@MildHepcat) July 16, 2021
Others have suggested they could slip the wick in while standing up, while some have gone so far as to suggest that a bit of teamwork from the gymnasts in the room will make things more than simple.
“Anti-sex” beds at the Olympics pic.twitter.com/2jnFm6mKcB
— Rhys Mcclenaghan (@McClenaghanRhys) July 18, 2021
Finally, some have pointed out that the beds are – like many of the athletes are being said to be – more than capable of taking a pounding.
Final thought: Yeah, nah, we’re stumped. I mean, it’s not like people have ever had sex outside of beds before, so we don’t know what they’re going to do about this. Let us know if you’ve got any ideas.
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