Geologist gets revenge on neighbour who left huge boulder in her driveway
G’day, ya toerags. How are you all doing? Hopefully, you’re not dealing with neighbours as painful as the ones the star of today’s story, Melissa Scruggs from California, has to endure. Anyone who’s ever lived next door to bogans, douchebags or party animals knows it can be a bloody testing experience. When those conflicts build up to the point of intentional f**kery, s**t can get pretty heated indeed. If you are like Melissa, you might want to take a page out of her book, because the way she dealt with her neighbours’ latest stunt f**ken rocked.
Let’s start things off with an exercise in imagination. Just don’t close your eyes because you won’t be able to read the rest of this. Anyway, picture yourself walking out to the car so you can go to work. Now, envisage a big bloody boulder in front of your car so you can’t get out. Finally, add the knowledge that it was put there by the drunken buggers next door as a way to troll the s**t out of you.
You’d rage. You know it, I know it, and pretty soon, the neighbours are going to know it. That’s because Melissa, a fiery redhead on her best days, is also a bloody geologist. That means she’s got a collection of high powered tools designed to break rock into rubble.
Now, in defence of the neighbours and in the interest of giving them a fair go, they were drunk. So using a rock to block off the annoying chick next door’s car might seem like a good way to get back at her for, in her own words, being, “the evil lady who requests that if they have a party and people park in the driveway that they move their cars by 7am so she can get to work.”
What this idea doesn’t take into account is that you’re going to be sleeping off a night on the piss when she has to go to work – and it’s going to be noisy and annoying to be woken up by a bloody pneumatic drill. Deadset, this legendary sheila busted out the power tools and woke the b**tards up with a rocking display of baddassery.
To finish, after the event, she made eye contact with the neighbours. “One gave me a nod, and the other looked at me with wide eyes like I’m a madwoman. I’d like to think that we have reached a mutual understanding.”
Final thought: This is one of the all-time backfires in neighbourhood disputes. And the best part is that the neighbours would have been all smiles until the sound of rock-breaking woke them up. Good s**t.
If you’re in the mood, check out some of these other neighbourhood disputes.
Just in case you missed it, here’s one of Ozzy’s latest commentary videos…Ozzy Man Reviews: Kangaroos
H/T: WOKE SLOTH.