Shirtless Russian bloke with knife in back leaves hospital for a durry in the freezing
Man With Knife In Back Walks Out Of Hospital For Cigarette Under -10°C Temperature
Despite the fact every cigarette-smoking mother**ker you know claims they could quit smoking any time they wanted, the habit’s supposed to be a f**ken doozie to kick. Not only that, but just maintaining the habit seems to put all manner of blokes and blokettes in uncompromising positions. Outside in the cold and the rain, in those stupid little cubes at airports, and behind the storage sheds at school. Of course, if you’re Russian, you’ll go to even greater lengths…
Deadset, before we begin, have a look at the placement on the f**ken stab-wound. Whoever put their pigsticker in old mate’s spine must be like a f**ken sniper when he plays darts, because that bloody knife is right in the f**ken bullseye. Seriously, how the f**k is this dude even alive, let alone walking around so he can smash back a darb?
Anyway, getting to the video, old mate Vladimir is supposed to be sitting still while he waits for doctors to come and remove the weapon from his vertebrae. F**k that, though. Vladimir needs a smoke, and he’s not waiting around like some pussy for the doctor to finish delivering babies or whatever the f**k he’s doing.
Yeah, nah, he’s off. Clearly a believer in the old adage that it’s better to ask for forgiveness than for permission, he shuffles off to the foyer while nurses question him. Finally, after growing sick of their inane questions about where the f**k he thinks he’s going, he’s like, “I’m going for a f**ken dart. Is that all right with you?”
The nurses are kinda like, “Yeah, nah, it’s not all right, you crazy b**tard. It’s winter out there and all you’re wearing is a skimpy little pair of shorts. It’s so cold, your bloody nipples won’t just harden, they’ll f**ken explode.”
Vladimir, though, he’s not bothered by the demands of soft-hearted women or the need to chill the f**k out when someone’s treated your spinal cord like their personal sheath. He’s coming back when he’s ready. And if his knife-wound wants to bleed a little more, than that’s something he’ll let the nurses worry about.
Final thought: These articles come up and the editors are always like, “You love these Russia stories,” but it’s obvious to see why. They just keep getting crazier and crazier. Besides, when the story’s got a dude named Vladimir rocking a knife in his back, you know it’s a good one. So, in the interests of comparing battle scars, what’s the toughest thing you’ve ever withstood?
Just in case you missed it, here’s one of Ozzy’s latest commentary videos…Ozzy Man Reviews: Pro Kabaddi