Bloke from Florida gets arrested for RKO’ing an inflatable Alligator
One bonza meme from the other side of the pond that we see here in Ozzyland a fair bit concerns the many and varied tales of Florida man. To us, Florida man seems like a bit of a classic. If there’s something base, classless or crude to get involved in, Florida man seems to be all over it. In fact, the tales of Florida man remind us a bit of our bogans. Anyway, this tale of Florida man involves a shopping centre, an inflatable alligator and of course, a man from Florida.
So, anyway, let’s get to Florida and get this story started. 18-year-old Gianny Sosa-Hernandez was hanging out at the local Miami-Dade County Mall when he noticed an inflatable alligator in one of the mall’s ponds.
Obviously, because kids do this sort of s**t, he got it into his head that he should wrestle the alligator. In fairness, to Gianny, he’s no Steve.
Nevertheless, he ripped his shirt off like all the best fighters do when they’re about to rumble, jumped the fence and started s**t with the alligator.
Defenseless, the alligator could only stare what-the-f**kly into space as Gianny RKO’ed it. Satisfied his fatality had thoroughly f**ked the inflatable crocodiliac up, he pinned it for three and got the f**k out of there.
Of course, this is 2019 and kids always make the mistake of posting their antics online.
Which, let’s be honest, is a bit of a drongo’s mistake. The alligator was worth about $3,700 US dollarydoos and the video proves he damaged it.
As you can imagine, the cops charged him. In their arrest report, they said:
The Miami-Dade Police Department, Kendall District, has arrested Gianny Sosa-Hernandez for vandalising a local mall.
Sosa-Hernandez, 18, was video recorded jumping over a wooden pedestrian barrier, grabbing a display alligator and throwing it into a shallow pond. He pretended to wrestle the alligator and later posted the video on social media platforms.
Sosa-Hernandez damaged the display alligator, valued at $3,690. The mall manager confirmed the video was recorded inside the mall. Sosa-Hernandez has been arrested and charged accordingly.
If you’re thinking that arresting the kid seems like a bit much, it might have something to do with the fact, he tried the same wrestling move on his school principal last week.
There’s some pretty dodgy footage of a hostile interaction between him and a teacher here.
So, on top of charges for damaging the alligator, he’s also up on charges of battery on a school official and interference with an educational institution. Good on ya, Florida man!
Final thought: Taking everything into account, we reckon this kid should fight a real alligator to make up for it all. That oughtta make him think twice.
Just in case you missed it, here’s one of Ozzy’s latest commentary videos…Ozzy Man Reviews: Game of Thrones Season 8 Episode 1
Video Link: Sosatooraw