Crikey: North Korea Issues This Direct Threat To Australia

The Guardian have reported that North Korea will possibly strike Australia if we continue in “blindly and zealously toeing the US line.”

Photo: KCTV

In the report that issues a direct ‘f*ck you’ to the land down under, North Korea warned that “If Australia persists in following the US moves to isolate and stifle the DPRK and remains a shock brigade of the US master, this will be a suicidal act of coming within the range of the nuclear strike of the strategic force of the DPRK.

“The Australian foreign minister had better think twice about the consequences to be entailed by her reckless tongue-lashing before flattering the US.”

Australia’s foreign minister Julie Bishop had said earlier this week that the nuclear weapons at North Korea’s disposal were “a serious threat” to Australia’s well-being. The US vice president Mike Pence also discussed the issue while visiting Australia this week, saying North Korea is “an urgent and dangerous” threat to Australia’s wellbeing.

Photo: BBC

Pence and Australian Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull were at a joint press conference to issue their ‘nah f*ck you return’, with Pence saying that “While all options are on the table, let me assure you the United States will continue to work closely with Australia, our other allies in the region and China to bring economic and diplomatic pressure to bear on the regime.”

Couldn't visit Australia without seeing the kangaroos. Karen, Charlotte, Audrey and I enjoying our morning visit to @tarongazoo. #VPinAUS pic.twitter.com/wMhKnhHxcb

— Vice President Pence (@VP) April 23, 2017

So how worried should us Aussies be in our comfortable deck chairs at weekend barbecues?

First, North Korea would need a missile capable of travelling the more than 7000 kilometres to Australia. Secondly, they need a nuclear payload that can fit on that rocket.

The longest range missile Pyongyang has tested so far is the Musudan, capable of travelling between 2500 to 3500 kilometres.

And it’s worth noting that while this is the first time Pyongyang has made a direct nuclear threat against Australia, it has been doing so against other countries for decades. It threatened to turn South Korea into a “sea of fire” last year. And the year before. And the year before that. And going all the way back to the f*cking 90’s.

So, without proven long range missiles that can carry a nuclear bomb, nothing to worry about for Australia right?

Yes – but it’s possible that may change in the next few years. North Korea’s last missile test was a massive flop however, here’s hoping they keep on finding their way to destination f*cked for the foreseeable future.