Manager threatens “sick” employee, employee responds the best way possible
Taking time off work can always be a dodgy prospect. We all know who the dodgy sheilas are who take off the Friday before Splendour in the Grass every year. We also know who the cheeky blokes who only ever get sick on Mondays are. Of course, every now and then, people get genuinely ill. In those instances, most sane people want those plague-bearing sacks of contagion to stay the f**k away. Not all bosses see it that way, though. This is a great story of that back-firing.
Anyway, how the f**k are you legends? Hopefully you’ve had a sh*t-hot new years and you’re pumped and ready to kick 2019 in the dick. Back to the story, though, Sarah was crook as a f**ken dog one morning. Without going into too much detail, it sounds like she had the sort of bug that makes venturing any further than three feet from the dunny a risky business.
She did the sensible thing. Concerned that she would spew everywhere and sh*t herself in public, she called in sick. At first, that all seemed to be sweet, but then word got through to her department manager, who was like, “Yeah, nah, fuck ya. If you don’t come to work, I’ll have to give you a written reprimand.”
On hearing this news, we assume that Sarah was like, “Oh, for f**k’s sake!”
She went to work. The other blokes and blokettes in the office were like, “F**k, Sarah, you look like warmed up piss.” Deadset, they even took her to the store manager (who seems like a bloody legend). The store manager was like, “Go home. You’re bloody sick.”
And then the department manager who made her come to work shows up. Sarah’s response was bloody tops. She was like, “Oi, have you seen The Exorcist? It has a really good bit. I’ll show you my impression of it.”
That’s when she puked her f**ken tits up.
That’s not the best bit, though. And, yeah, nah, this isn’t a Stand By Me contagious barf-fest, either. Nope, the best bit is that the Store Manager made the slave-driving deputy manager clean it up. The legend even issued her with a warning for professional misconduct.
Final thought: This is the perfect example of karma in action. If you are someone who ‘manages’ people at work, make a point of not questioning how sick they are. It might end up being in your best interests to just give ‘em the day off.
If you’ve got the stomach for it, here’s a bunch of people puking to a RATM soundtrack. Enjoy!
Just in case you missed it, here’s one of Ozzy’s latest commentary videos…Ozzy Man Reviews: Mayweather v Tenshin
H/T: Bored Panda.