Sheila demands persuasive essay for her BJ services, bloke writes the mother of all essays
The humble bj is indeed a pretty f**ken marvellous thing. Anyone who’s ever had one won’t need convincing otherwise. Unfortunately, for some blokes, getting some mouth to south resuscitation isn’t as simple as it looks. Believe it or not, there are actually wives and girlfriends out there who don’t enjoy playing the skin flute. For their significant others, that means that getting their knob gobbled can be quite a daunting task. There could be chores involved. There could be flowers. And if your missus is really evil, there could be essays. Yep. Essays.
Credit: TheGreatCowRace
Imgur user, TheGreatCowRace recently shared a text exchange – and subsequent essay – where a chick (we’re assuming because the essay is titled GFStudies – P01) demands a persuasive essay with a strong thesis statement on why she should take her temperature with a meat thermometer.
Credit: TheGreatCowRace
Obviously, considering you know there’s a subsequent essay, the dude is only too happy to oblige. He responds with, “I’ll fucking do it.” And so begins his quest to write the essay according to this demanding sheila’s conditions.
So, here’s the truth, the essay itself is kind of a rambling mess. Seeing as there’s no clarification as to whether or not he had his carrot waxed after the fact, we’re not sure he got lucky. Anyway, he begins with a bit of a pun on a Shakespearean proverb.
Credit: TheGreatCowRace
From there, he kinda meanders his way through the classic, ‘it’s actually good for you’ argument. In fairness to him, though, he does manage to quote some science on this and flip it around so she might feel like it benefits her. He also manages to draw it together so it’s about improving intimacy between them and not solely about him busting a nut, so there’s got to be some kudos for that.
Still, it’s a bit of a slog to read. Let’s hope she only took a perfunctory glance and saw to him solely on effort.
Credit: TheGreatCowRace
Final thought: What do you blokes and blokettes reckon? Is this essay worthy of a blowie? Let us know in the comments.
Just in case you missed it, here’s one of Ozzy’s latest commentary videos…Ozzy Man Reviews: Quickest Dog Ever
H/T: IMGUR.
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