Get some perspective: These things happened at the same time
History is one of those funny things that seems pretty straightforward – and it kinda is when you’re looking at it in a ‘this sh*t happened in the past’ sorta way. But when you’re looking at things that happened concurrently in history, you may not have full perspective. It seems there’s a dissonance functioning somewhere between ‘this shit happened in the past’ and ‘this sh*t also happened in the past’ that may blur the lines and confuse us when it comes to just how recent – or how old – some events are…
With that in mind, Bored Panda have posted a few comparisons to give us some perspective. And sure, some of it is pretty much common sense if you’re not a complete dipsh*t, but there are some things on there that make you go. Fark…really?
The Colosseum in Rome was unveiled to the adoring masses at around the same time the Gospel of Luke was written. I guess this one kinda makes sense when you consider the Romans are quite often bad guys in the Bible, but when large swathes of humanity often think of Christianity as being around right from the very start of civilisation, this kinda comparison is eye-opening.
Believe it or not, Ecstasy, was the latest craze at just about the same time the Titanic crashed into a giant f**ken iceberg. That’s a bloody mind-blower if you ask me. I thought this was firmly something the 90s were responsible for. But, er, yeah, nah. 1912. Fark!
Considering how recent the horrors of Auschwitz actually are, this is another one that a little bit of thought makes you go, er, yeah, no sh*t. When you juxtapose the reality of cheap, family-friendly burgers and the calculated genocide of the Holocaust, you can only really ask yourself why.
F**ken woolly mammoths are proper ancient, right? You know, coming around right after the dinosaurs and lasting just long enough to see out the ice-age? Guess again. These pricks were still walking around by the time the pyramids were a thousand years old. Holy sh*tballs!
All right then, how about those Aztecs. Those f**kers are old, right? Well, yeah, they are, but Oxford University is older. While we were getting edumacated in fancy buildings and praising all of our worldly knowledge, we were still finding and slaughtering new cultures all around the world.
Okay, f**ken Nintendo can’t be that old. Except it can. Where else do you think Jack the Ripper learned to slice and dice hookers? Video games, obviously. All violence is the fault of video games. Thanks, Nintendo!
Yeah, nah, the guillotine is brutal as f**k. How would you feel knowing that the last execution by guillotine in France happened in 1977 – the year Star Wars was released? This one definitely gets a big f**ken crikey!
Travelling to the moon is pretty much the height of technology. You think that not much science we rely on today would be newer than it? Well, how about the fact scientists couldn’t agree on whether tectonic plates were actually a thing? Yeah, nah, they hadn’t sorted that out by the time we were on the moon. Lazy shits!
Final thought: History is bloody awesome. Edumacate yourself and have a look at how many things we only have some vague idea of are actually a lot more interesting – or recent – than we give them credit for.
Just in case you missed it, here’s one of Ozzy’s latest commentary videos…Ozzy Man Reviews: KSI v Logan Paul
H/T: Bored Panda.