Ozzy sheila gives birth to bloody huge 5.9kg baby
Let’s give some credit where it’s due. Sheilas are tough as bloody nails and that’s no bulls**t. Seriously, carrying around any baby is hard enough work, but carrying one full-term – inside your guts no less – is a f**ken herculean effort. When the baby’s a big bugger, the kudos grows with it, and er, yeah, there’s a newborn down here in Ozzyland who’s so bloody big, she’s almost double the average, leading her mum to dub her a sumo! Check it out!
Rightio, we can hear all the sheilas out there in Facebook-land getting clucky and keen, so you blokes might wanna move over while we introduce Remi Frances Millar. Remi, who’s a premature baby came out of the oven at a whopping 5.88 kilos.
We don’t know if you know much about kids, but that’s f**ken massive. That’s a solid 13 pounds for those playing in America.
Deadset, the average weight for a newborn down here is only 3.3 kilos. Remi could eat a kid that size for breakfast and ask for seconds.
Remi’s mum, Emma – who’s fine, thanks for asking – was expecting a biggun, but even she was left surprised by the behemoth birth! “She’s like a mini sumo wrestler. I did expect to have a larger baby as I had gestational diabetes but not this big. At 35 weeks an ultrasound revealed she was about 4kg (8.8lbs) but we didn’t think she’d grow that much more.” Well, you thought wrong, Emma. Remi’s bloody done that and then some. What a champ.
Daniel, Remi’s old man, reckons that Remi’s so big, she’s attracting gawkers. “When I’ve walked around with her there’s always a crowd of people – midwives, other new parents and visitors – around her, asking about her size because she’s so much bigger than all the other newborns.”
For obvious reasons, Remi wasn’t born naturally, and she’s so big, she’s almost left Emma with a problem. Until her stitches have healed, 6 kilos is the limit for what she’s allowed to lift. “She’s about the limit I’ve been told. It ended up being an emergency caesar again with Remi,” she said. “I don’t think I could have handled a natural birth with her.”
Final thought: Yeah, nah, we dunno about you, but we reckon that’s a bloody monster of a kid. Still, we reckon all the sheilas out there will just see that as a few extra kilos of cuteness. Anyway, this is probably time for all the mums in the Facebook comments to shine. Let us know how big your little one was when you popped them out. Let’s see if we can find the biggest birth in Ozzy Man fandom!
Just in case you missed it, here’s one of Ozzy’s latest commentary videos…Ozzy Man Reviews: WTF Happened in September 2019
Video Link: Nine News
H/T: DAILY MAIL.