South African Pastor blows everyone’s minds bringing bloke “back to life” at service

Credit: Alph Lukau

South African Pastor blows everyone’s minds bringing bloke “back to life” at service

Bringing dudes back to life has long been a goal of mankind. From Victor Frankenstein to Herbert West, our literature’s absolutely chockers with pricks who want to show they can cross the pale and assume the power of the gods themselves. Of course, you bloody can’t. It’s just not possible. And if it was, we all know the reality would be far more akin to Pet Sematary than anything else. Still, that doesn’t stop people from pretending they can do it. Just ask this South African pastor.

Credit: Alph Lukau

That’s right. We’re heading to South Africa for this one. The land of the springbok. In the video you’re about to see, controversial pastor Alph Lukau, whose general gimmick seems to be laying on hands and running church services that belong in True Detective-like shows, takes a bloke who’s kicked the f**ken bucket and brings him back to life.

Credit: Alph Lukau

Apparently. The undertakers who own the mortuary where he performed his stunt are not very f**ken happy. “We would like to distance ourselves from the supposed resurrection of a deceased man by Alleluia Ministries who allegedly was at our mortuary,” they said.

We were approached by alleged family members of the deceased who informed us they had encountered a dispute with a different funeral service provider and would like to use our transport services, which we offered them.

We did not supply the coffin neither did we store the deceased at our mortuary and no paper work was processed by Kings and Queens Funerals.

As a funeral services provider we do not offer services without documentation neither do we repatriate bodies without any paper work.

We are in the process of taking legal action for this malicious damage to our image.

Credit: Alph Lukau

So, in other words, they’re claiming old mate Alph and his Alleluia Ministry is full of the proverbial brown stuff. Alph, though, he’s like, “Nuh-uh. I did so raise that Lazarus mother**ker and I’ve got the green potion to prove it.”

He said an “Astounding miracle took place in the house of God this morning.” Who you believe depends on how gullible you are.

Credit: Alph Lukau

Final thought: To be honest, this is the kind of s**t everyone would love to believe is true, but the reality is that it’s actually done in pretty poor taste. Thousands of people are watching this s**t, hoping for some help from a man who professes to have the power of a God. In turn, he fleeces them of their hard-earned cash. If there is a heaven or a hell, it’s pretty obvious which one he’ll be going to.

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H/T: DAILY MAIL.