Chuck Steinway

Chuck, not his real name, is a Brisbane writer and teacher. He writes radio commercials, feature articles, short stories and longer-form fiction. You can read his fiction in Dark Moon Digest 32/33 from Perpetual Motion Machine Publishing. It's got crocodiles! http://perpetualpublishing.com/product/dark-moon-digest-issue-32-33/

Terrifying footage of “fire tornado” ripping through California looks like hell on Earth

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Holy sh*tballs, blokes and blokettes. Have you seen the f**ken fire that’s been tearing its way through California over the last week or so? It’s forced the evacuation of thousands upon thousands of citizens and shows...

Two old blokes escape the nursing home for German metal festival

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F**K YES!!! It’s summer in Europe, and that means the metal festivals are in full swing. And whether you love metal or you’re one of those who just doesn’t get it (it’s OK, not everyone is cool enough), you have to ad...

Cop busy texting on his phone drives his car straight into a cyclist

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Of all the people in the world who most definitely should not be using their mobile phone while they drive, you’d have to say the boys in blue are right up there. They’re supposed to be role models, exemplary citizens...

Snoop Dogg and Jamie Foxx freestyle an entire song on radio show and nail it

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It’s no bloody secret that when you’ve got Snoop Dogg on your radio show, you’re hoping for some pure gold. You want the hip-hop legend to give you something that’ll make his interview with you truly bloody special. I...

The world’s smallest condom has hit the shops

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In news that’s sure to make for a few awkward discussions at the counter, the world’s smallest condom has finally hit stores. At about half the size of existing condoms designed for the smaller phallus, and marketed a...

People are jumping out of moving cars because of a Drake song

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If you’ve ever been on a road-trip with the boys and the wrong bloke has been DJ, you know what it’s like to feel like you need to jump out of a moving car because of the music. Of course, you’ve probably never done i...

Vietnam’s new f*cken stunning bridge looks like something from Lord of the Rings

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We all know that Kiwiland (New Zealand for the politically correct among you), is the place to go for everything Lord of the Rings. The landscapes there are so close to Tolkien’s descriptions, you could set a film bas...

The CDC has warned people to stop washing and reusing their condoms

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Good evening blokes and blokettes, how ya doing? In today’s absolutely horrifying news, the Centre for Disease Control and Prevention, America’s number one health organisation, has tweeted a reminder that you should n...

Bloke 100% committed to giving Google Maps the ultimate f**k you

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The Google Maps camera really is, when you think about it, the ultimate in ‘creepy’ technology. It’s got photos of your house, your work place, your favourite hangouts, and all your friend’s places too. It’s the ultim...

Sacha Baron Cohen’s latest prank is his most ridiculous yet

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There’s a lot of talk about Sacha Baron Cohen’s latest series, Who is America? right now, and with stunts and pranks as over the bloody top and as ridiculously outlandish as the complete f**ken gem he pulled on a coup...

Bloke walks into Town Council meeting and argues for legalisation of handjobs

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The beauty of a true, functioning democracy is that everyone really CAN have their say. Your opinion might be unpopular, it might be childish, it might be a stitch-up by your mates, but you’re entitled to put it to a ...

Man rigs Maccas monopoly game for $32 million

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Bloody hell, this Mcstory has got all the ingredients necessary to make a McDonald’s themed sequel to Office Space. Did you hear about the cheeky inside con-job from the Maccas worker who handled the McDonald’s Monopo...

Meet Maxdonna – the dog whose impersonations of Madonna are f**ken mint

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Some people dedicate their lives to the art of mimicry and impersonation. They work hard at that sh*t, and they drop lots and lots of coin on it, but every now and then along comes a natural. An impersonator who doesn...

$1500 Telsa surfboards sells out instantly

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F**ken Tesla – the technology giant, not the fairly decent rock band – have set themselves up as one of the primo environmentally-friendly and socially woke companies of the modern era. With tonnes of cool inventions,...

Monkey steals a bike, fends off a dog and rides off like a f*cken boss

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Riding a bike is one of those things that everyone has to learn. It’s also one of the things that you really shouldn’t forget. But how would you manage riding your pushy around a tiny little area while an annoying-as-...