Chuck Steinway

Chuck, not his real name, is a Brisbane writer and teacher. He writes radio commercials, feature articles, short stories and longer-form fiction. You can read his fiction in Dark Moon Digest 32/33 from Perpetual Motion Machine Publishing. It's got crocodiles! http://perpetualpublishing.com/product/dark-moon-digest-issue-32-33/

This sheila claims shes raking in $30k per month thanks to her sugar-daddies

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We’re pretty sure that most of you blokes in the Facebook comments are familiar with the concept of the sugar-daddy. Put simply, you earn bloody billions and then you pay young ladies to hang out with you in exchange ...

Sheila shares addictive technique that helped her stop the urge to cut herself

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You know, the world’s not always a bloody lovely place. Sometimes you feel down. Sometimes you feel like s**t and you really don’t know why. Of course, we don’t all have good ways of dealing with the stress that can c...

Bloke throws fridge down cliff before cops make him go and get it

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If you’ve ever watched My Name is Earl, you know that karma is a bloody bitch. Deadset, you throw some negative ju-ju out into the universe and then fate gives you a solid backhand and tells you not to be such a dick....

Bloke so upset by the sound of chewing, he hasn’t spoken to his family in years

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Let’s be honest, we all have our quirks and eccentricities. Usually, though, we find ways to manage them or to cope. In some circles, we might even call that kind of thing ‘growing up’. Don’t get us wrong, we know tha...

Bindi Irwin pens heartfelt message about her wedding to her Bloody Legend Dad, Steve!

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It’s no secret that we bloody well love Steve ‘Bloody Legend’ Irwin on this site. Of course, we can’t claim the copyright on that, he’s pretty much one of the most universally loved blokes ever, but there’s probably n...

Watch the hoverboard inventor fly across English Channel

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Mate, if there’s anyone in the world right now who deserves a rousing F**K YES, MATE, F**K YES, it’s absolutely, positively gotta be French inventor Franky Zapata. This bloody legend has successfully crossed the Engli...

Farmer proposes to girlfriend with an engagement ring on a cow’s udder

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G’day, ya big bloody bewdiful legends, how ya going? Hopefully, you’re doing mighty fine and you’re loving life. If you’re not, this udderly ridiculous story of rural romance oughtta cheer you right up. A picture that...

Bloke sent to Destination F**ked after spitting on the wrong one

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Anyone who was raised right knows that spitting on another bloke means it’s time throw fists. Deadset, there’s probably no faster way to guarantee a friggen fracas than hocking a loogie on someone. Obviously, there’s ...

Chinese kid sticks needle in his wanger to ‘keep himself awake’

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All right, we know some of you have some pretty tried and trusted mechanisms for pulling all night study sessions, but we’ll bet none of you have added new meaning to the term ‘prick’ in the way this 12-year-old Chine...

Aussie sheila found this huge bloody spider in her living room

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Ooh yeah, you know we love to show off some of our true-blue Ozzy wildlife here on this very website, and this post is one of those. Yeah, we’re coming back to the fabled Ozzy spider. This time, we don’t have anything...

Electrician wires his van to give tool thieves 1000 volt shock

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Here at Ozzyman Reviews, we’re pretty comfortable saying that bloody thieves are amongst the lowest scum of the earth. Deadset, we’ve got no time for them at all, so when we hear that someone’s come up with a new way ...

This ‘young’ sheila’s beauty filter glitches and exposes her as a 58-year-old woman

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Man, the internet’s a bloody tricky place at times. One minute you think you’re talking to a Nigerian prince and the next, you’ve been bloody duped. By the same token, you might be talking to a ‘gorgeous sheila’ on Ti...

Check out these bloody satisfying restaurant comebacks to bad reviews

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In this day and age, there are certainly times when it can seem like everyone is a pro-reviewer, and that’s got a lot to do with the ease of getting online and sharing some thoughts about your recent meal. Deadset, du...

Sheila graffitis around whole city trying to contact unborn child’s father

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Back in the day, communication was pretty bloody simple. You just drew a bloody picture on the wall and all the other caveblokes and cavesheilas saw the picture and got the message. These days, there are loads more wa...

Pregnant Mother demands woman change her dog’s name to use it for her daughter

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As you know, the world is friggen chock-a-block with crazy. It really doesn’t matter where you go, you’re pretty likely to bump into at least one person who’s positively cuckoo. And, yeah, nah, we’re not trying to tal...